SUNKISSED BRONZED PERFECTION

spent the weekend at baguio for arends soccer tourney. twas fun.

i don't really have anything to talk about..

i do have something to talk about...

for the last week of april, i've been rather busy because theres this something i've been preparing for for since march. i made it and it's all in *god's* hands now. its the reason why i had a facebook-fast. i still don't want to mention it for anti-jinxing purposes of course, but i'm glad i went through it. i did it. and now, i'm empty again.

crapito.

How can I explain
Talking to myself
Will I see again

We are always running for the thrill of it thrill of it
Always pushing up the hill searching for the thrill of it
On and on and on we are calling out and out again
Never looking down I’m just in awe of what’s in front of me

Is it real now
When two people become one
I can feel it
When two people become one

Thought I’d never see
The love you found in me
Now it’s changing all the time
Living in a rhythm where the minutes working overtime

Catch me I’m falling down
Catch me I’m falling down

Don’t stop just keep going on
I’m your shoulder lean upon
So come on deliver from inside
All we got is tonight that is right till first light

are you as bored with this as i am?

the rain is awesome

but it does mean landslides and floods all around... bleh.

was eating my brekky just a while back and reading the newspaper.

WHY IS EVERYONE GETTING INTO CANNES?

isn't the world supposed to wait for me? that was MY festival!

okay, not MINE. but yea.. theres been like 5 filmmakers who got into cannes this year! and although that is super duper awesome for the industry and shiz, now cannes doesnt sound as lucrative as it did before all these acceptances. (to me, at least) you know me and my love for the chase.

ANYWAY, i'm going to sundance. ha.

whoever said putting up your own company is easy was full o' bull.

..maybe nobody said that.. i just thought it was.

its sooo frustrating!

ayayayayay

make me a mixtape

what the fuck am i doing

the most amazing email made my morning:

that nyuproject we all lost sleep, food and patience over is going to palmsprings!!

whew.

thenksghad.

what a day, spent most of it in tagaytay stuffing my face for mothers day. LOVE IT.

plus, just came home from watching star trek.

i enjoyed it, surprisingly.

furreals.

Mainly because of Kirk who is mayjah hot and Spock- yes, Spock. I don't know why, or how i thought he was anywhere near attractive but he was, in a geeky trekkie sort of way. NOT zachary quinto though, he was -gulp, dare i say it?- Hotter as spock than as himself.

Anyway, the movie was not bad at all, I understood it, thought it was cool and admired a few shots to boot.

hmm. Zef, is it time to retire your portrait from my desktop?

--

after 2 minutes

i take it back.

zachary quinto is hot as spock and/or himself.... but not as hot as chris pine/jim kirk.

bow.

i can't wait for the transformers movie... i might just replace zef with shia for a little bit.

i am very quickly regretting entering this experiment. i would rather have left my head in a cloud than to realize i wasn't being heard. hmmm.

damn it, damn it to hell.

also, in other news (not half naked boys, i promise)

my love and i have taken a break, not at all mutual, but i have to do other things too. Which he understands. hmm.

-

is it time to panic when i start addressing work as the love of my life?

so i didn't really think about that.

now it makes my experiment inconclusive. shit.

i was never a scientist. the closest i can come to anything scientific is mythbusters. nyaaaah

Pain you experienced recently is fading. Keep moving and leave the past behind.

In Detail

Next time you're frustrated because you can't find something, try to remember that sometimes being forgetful can be a blessing! The same brain that makes you lose your keys or forget your ATM password is the same brain that erases hurtful episodes from your life. The pain you experienced in your life recently is fading slowly, and each day you feel it less than the previous day's pain. So keep moving forward and leave the past behind.

--

waw.

one of my best kept secrets is on star movies. hmph.

i was hoping to keep it under the radar forever.

i'm thinking of getting bangs again.

just because when i feel lazy to fix my hair i can just wear it down and look faboosh!

although theres the problem of when i wake up and its all over the place..

hmmm

spoc- ehh- zachary quinto.

hmmm

Just waiting for my files to attach.

It was a pretty okay day, spent most of it driving and with family and with the balloon.

and another one, before i forget:

REGISTER TO VOTE!

on to more boring news...

i'm bored.

the airship crew is still like a set without an ad or a pm.. my mom and sister have been pushing me to step up. and i am, slowly... starting with the website.

ANYWAY, i was watchin hairspray a few nights back.. i totally miss having a schoolgirl crush on anyone.

bleeeh

You’re in my arms
And all the world is calm
The music playing on for only two
So close together
And when I’m with you
So close to feeling alive

A life goes by
Romantic dreams will stop
So I bid mine goodbye and never knew
So close was waiting, waiting here with you
And now forever I know
All that I wanted to hold you
So close

So close to reaching that famous happy end
Almost believing this was not pretend
And now you’re beside me and look how far we’ve come
So far we are so close

How could I face the faceless days
If I should lose you now?
We’re so close
To reaching that famous happy end
And almost believing this was not pretend
Let’s go on dreaming for we know we are
So close
So close
And still so far

--

aww. this song reminds me so much of HS. not that i knew of it before the movie..it just feels so highschool-y.

i was also browsing through my old english notebook in mhs.. i had a lot of freewritten stuff in there. not exactly my bestest but they were probably the saddest and most truthful out of everything that i've written.

i remembered only a few things from my long ass dream last night

1) there was a gigantor butterfly (the size of my head) which flew above me (while i was lying in bed). I laid there just watching it and then i lifted my head a little bit and the butterfly became my pillow.

wtf, right?

2) it was my first day in high school (again) but im already 21. my teachers were all excited to see me and gave me my old stuff back from when i was originally in HS. whaa?

oi.

Socializing over food is a great way to catch up with friends -- make a date today.

In Detail

Socializing over food is a great way to catch up with friends -- and you know you have at least one friend you need to make time for! Pick an old favorite or a new spot you want to try, and invite this person to join you. When you're chatting over a great meal, you're feeding your soul as you feed your belly! And dining out doesn't need to be a big expense. Even if you just grab a sandwich somewhere, you're sure to have a great time reconnecting and building your relationship.

-

This is what i exactly did today.. down to the sandwhich part. and i didn't even read this until 2 seconds ago!

My HS friends and I met up to play lasertag and have dinner and dessert. It was super duper fun, i missed all of them so much!

I was browsing through my highschool journal and i saw a website written on the last page. I went to it and saw my short lived stint in Diary land. I only had 6 entries in because blogging wasn't my priority and i was still devouring pens and nice notebooks to use as my journal.

Anyway, I copy-pasted the entries i found there written by my 16 year old self.

enjoy.

--

hokidoki.. this is my very first time to write thoughts in the internet... for everyone to see.. hehehe, well... i originally signed up in easyjournal but thought all my other friends were using this sooo.. i terminated my account there and went here! tah-dah! hhehehe, nutn much happened today... usual things: i woke up super early, finished reading this fab book, watched the whole of SATC season 5 and went to the mall. 2004-04-18 10:53 p.m.

halooo... today was okay. training wasn't at all bad. it was actually okay-not that its normally not okay. its just that i dunno... i was happy today. after that i hung out with my 3g friends.. i missed them well, nothing really special happened today... nothing life-changing. oh yea, i played tennis, will that count? heheh..

i have to start on my novel. i really really wanna go through with it. I AM NOT KIDDING. i am actually planning to write a nobel-prize winning novel. hahhaha! i wish.

aaahhh.. i know what to talk about. a friend of mine called me late last night. he had a problem with his gf, (my best friend) and we talked about it. after finally admitting to him i didn't know what to do we just started talking about things. we talked about people, my friends, school until eventually we ended up talking about how non-existent my non-existent love life is. i really didn't get the exact words he said but the summary was that i wasn't that approachable.. [or that's what i think it was]. my reaction deep inside?: "putang ina.. unapproachable??? im the friendliest fucking girl they could ever meet... in a fucking century!" [not unless i don't like them,of course-then i could be a real bitch]. i dunno. if they think i'm not approachable then, they can fcuk off. arggh. 2004-04-19 7:28 p.m.

went to my dentist today. he changed my elastics to yellow. hahaha anyway, i'm supposed to meet my friends today for red box.. but i'm not feeling extra well today + i don't have transportation. oh well, they'll just have to go on with out the star... moi! hahahah just kidding... i'm gonna bum around and finish this new book i bought about faeries.. really interesting...

i do not understand how my friends decorate their sites so fucking well.. i tried to do that earlier, all i ended up was a bunch of percent signs that i do not understand. bull. whatever. 2004-04-20 11:08 a.m.

i am almost finished with 'tithe' the book i was telling you about.. the one about faeries... now i want to be a faery. heheh. anyway, i was supposed to write about something sensible here, i just forgot what it was. i already had it all lined in my head ready for typing but the surveys in friendster i just had to read... curse it...

okay, i vaguely remember what it was about but i distinctly remember the song that was playing on the radio as i was thinking it. strong enough- stacie orrico.... hmmmm... hold on.. i almost have it...argh...

i'll get back to ya in a few... 2004-04-20 8:35 p.m.

the day was normal. nothing special again. remember what i was supposed to write? well, i remembered it. and decided to not share it here. [forgive me..] it was just the hormones. well, i've ran out of books to read, surveys to answer, and things to do.. so im fucking bored. bored to hell, to tears, to my stomach...pick one. tngina 2004-04-21 11:03 p.m.

well, i was out again. heheh of course. couldn't keep me in the house all day.. anyway, sas and i watched big fish.. twas kewlie. heheh cute. i saw the trailer for HP3.. damn.. daniel radcliffe is so fucking cute...so fucking cute. anyway, bought a new book. spiderwick 4. the one tyce and i have been waiting for for months! heheh

while waiting for our movie, sas and i got to talking about love ish.. and it just got to me that i aint got one.. and i'm actually okay with it. alright fine, i'm not THAT alright with it and it's not something i wanna brag about it's just that i'm ok. not happy, not sad.. just ok... hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm 2004-04-22 7:53 p.m.

----

5 years later and nothing has changed. Interesting.

all these legal hullabaloo is boring the bejeeezuz out of me

.. i'm just merely 'taking a break'

i went to a get together of sorts.. for my screenwriting mentor, Jeff. Or should i say, the one to blame for putting me back on the path of writing after convincing myself that i wasn't meant to be a writer...

ANYWAY, before i left he asked me what i was up to, i told him about the airship and the pending feature.. he sure looked disappointed and told me to "keep writing. Even if its one sentence or 10 pages a day. Just keep writing." 

i know i should.

Came from cupcakes with dani.. before that we came from hanging out at sassa's cause she and jecko broke up. We came with alcohol, chips and jollibee (of course). Got my bangs today too. ehh.. what else.. oh yea, dani and i talked about my life.. in 45 minutes, over lots of chocolate..... bleeeeh.

my heart feels heavy. i think its because i know exactly what i should do to get what i want, i just have to "sacrifice harmony to stay in the game" (as my accurate reading suggests).

Problem is, i'm not sure i want to just yet.

absolutely love this part from Rent.

(aka fierce)

came home from sassaj's show. MY FEET HURT LIKE CRAZY. but the shoes were totally worth it! i love how i didn't spend over p2000.00 for my entire outfit and completely rawked it!!! (i'd like to think)

ANYWAY, her collection was beautiful- AS ALWAYS. what else.. spent time with the gang. i heart them loads.

i also have to stop talking gay. my friends think i'm turning into one (the flamboyant, fabulous one; not the dyke-y type fyi.)

heh

i have to go now and put my feet in a tub of ice.

baboosh

okay. it's gotta be one of these:

A) all the mirrors that i've passed are ALL LIARS.

B) my friends are all liars.

C) i am anything but photogenic.

D) my eyes are that bad

..

Mayan just tagged HIDEOUS pictures of me looking like sheeeeett... i cannot untag because i don't believe in untagging.is there a 'hide' button?

i need to starve myself!!

i never wanted to dabble into phil politics before. i never really cared about voting and shiz until this year. don't ask me why now, i just do this time.

i also caught the anc leadership forum...

i have never heard chiz talk before but i can tell he's got the youth vote (not mine) because he's funny and rebellious. Can't blame him, the guy knows his market. I don't like how he thinks though... it's all against *insert anything under the sun here* Basically, he's a one-show pony... and i don't like his voice.

i forgot the other things i was gonna say.. i spent 20 minutes looking for youth statistics to prove my point, but i got distracted and found myself looking at old photos in ate's multiply.

I NEED TO STARVE MYSELF FORSERIOUSREALS!!!!!

...i'll write more about politics when i remember what i want to say.