SUNKISSED BRONZED PERFECTION

been a while. helloooo helloooo. I am fine. Got a wee-bit crazy a while back.

.....  i have a lot to say actually...

i just don't feel it.

 

 

 

 

i miss him

i guess you know which side i'm on?

 

ANYWAY, i'm so pumped up for that game. More than the players. its been a long time since i've been this excited about a game. YAHOOOOO.

damn, they HAVE to beat ateneo. THEY HAVE TO.

 

steph and i were reminiscing about how we never thought we'd end up in lasalle.

actually.. i did.. many times... since highschool.. and since mike cortez.

THANK GOD I DIDN'T GO TO ATENEO. not only is it hella far from home, its icky too. HA.

Oh, and to those who are probably saying that Im just bitter because i didn't pass the ACET, well guess what mothafuckers:

I DIDN'T TAKE THE ACET.

cheers to that! and cheers to the victory of the archers on sunday!

comments/suggestions/violent reactions are not welcome

 

i've been playing this sort of game with someone... someone i don't know.

what's driving me crazy is that we BOTH know its going on, the only problem is that it COULD BE ANYONE. damn it. i certainly hope its who i think it is.

 

some sort of a push is necessary

JUST SO I COULD EMPHASIZE MY POINT, I SHALL POST THE SAME ENTRY TO ALL THE BLOGS I AM SUBSCRIBED TO. thus...

 

Its christmas and i have no moolah. I love it still. I love christmas. no matter how shitty the previous months have been, when i see christmas lights up, and i hear christmas songs.. i melt. i do. perhaps this is the time of the year that i am the nicest and that time that i allow myself to be happy. cheesy as it may sound.

 

ladidadida.

no children, i am not in love (since when have i been anyway), and no i did not win the lottery.. its just the season. how wonderful is that. Im incredibly deliriously (abnormally) happy about christmas.

I found myself recreating my christmas 2 years ago in rhode island. that was, by far, MY BEST christmas EVER. Our relatives from my moms side all went to r.i., the songs they kept playing on the radio were classics, the parties we went to were super fun, and to top all that off, it snowed.. on Dec. 26... and ALL of us, even my parents, went out to the yard to participate in the "snow wars" (boys vs. girls). Then a couple of days after, we went to Newport to visit the mansions, it snowed there also- while we were at the breakers. Arend couldn't help but lie on the ground to make snow angels... in public. hahahaha After Christmas, we all went to NJ to celebrate new years. On new years eve we walked around time square and ice skated at central park. goodness. I don't think anything can compare to what i felt then... it was really.. i dunno... beautiful, and that was that one time that i could say i was truly, geniunely happy.

 

Its christmas...

 

we went to the bazaar at NBC today after my sisters and i ate lunch at sakae, i bought aroma-rocks (or something) that smelled like the christmas tree shops.. and now my house smells like hot apple pie.. :D I also propsed to my family that our color theme for this year should be orange. heheh i dunno, just so its different.

Its christmas everyone, its that time of the year to stop pretending you hate the world.. because you really don't- not really.

 

(goodness, i have turned into mrs. santa. please tell me if i have christmas trees growing out of my head-its time to decorate them :D [eww- but you get what i mean] )

i did something impulsive that i think i shouldn't have.. waaah! its more embarassing than anything really.. hahahahah! omg.. i can't believe i did that.. but i did anyway- the stars said i should. so i did. hahhahahahahhahahahahahahha

i'm so embarassed

okay, whats driving me crazy is the uncertainty part.. i wish i knew who i'm doing this with!!! this is insanity. (nah, not really.. ) but still. i'm sooo restless.. i wanna know.. really really really really.

okay, so now im thrown off track. Like totally way off track. not only am i confused now, im also a wee bit disappointed AND still giddy about christmas...

yea, i suggest to whoever it is to slap the oblivion out of my system because i am admittedly very slow as to these kinds of things..

so STEP UP, seriously..

DAMN IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

if there's one thing i hate, its KNOWING NOTHING.

argh!!!!!!!! fuckin a... yea, at first its cute.. but it keeps happening.. its driving me crazy...

although i am still happy about christmas :D

 

i told you i'm bipolar. or maybe im schizo now, i don't know.

 

(after about 30 seconds)

I am now officially crazy. chic crazy, not scary crazy.

(..and 30 seconds more...)

thank you for making me hyperventilate...

some kind of crazy bitch was typing here last night... it wasn't me, i swear.

yea.. so me-> NOW is calm. promise. and NOT crazy.. last night kind of cornered me so the outcome wasn't too nice.. if you've witnessed.

ANYWAY, something happened today: i don't know whether it was nice or sad but right after i felt kind of empty.. but not disappointed... but liberated. yea, something like that. so I saw my SG today, twice. the first time, i pretended not to see him-also because i was talking with someone on the phone so that was easy to pull off but yea, i SO KNOW he was looking. THe second time was more upfront because.. well... we kinda passed each other AND guess what i did.. or DIDN'T DO.....and i was with steph so it was something i couldn't avoid.

yea...  it was pretty "dead stars"-ish. as in the story? like i was still holding on to what i thought (or wanted) was (to be) there. But when i saw him... there was nothing. I usually stop breathing or something but i didn't. and I lost it.

 

I've freed myself from his clutch. i should be happy with that, right?

totally bored but i have no excuse to be. i actually have to write two papers due tomorrow for my lit class. both make up papers cause every friggin time my friend and i decide that we won't go to class, my prof decides to assign something important. that damn bitch.

anyway, i won't write until i feel like it. it's all gonna be BS anyway. ladidadida.

I'm still not TOTALLY TOTALLY okay btw-since last monday night. I'm good, but not really. Haven't opened up to anyone because they still know that i'm that girl who got bit by the Christmas bug... yea.. yesterday i felt like i was having hot flashes.. hahah yea, like the heat was totally coming from in me- i had to put an icepack on my nape and just lie on the floor for a couple of minutes.

SURELY, there are meds for this?  

as predicted, everything got better after the crying. if it wasn't really so sad, it would've been beautiful. as in physically. it was dark, only the christmas lights were on and there was this lone person at the corner-sitting, crying. It would've been a lovely photograph. But hey, no body really wants to take a photo of themselves crying.

yeap, all good.

we have to go to intramuros for our lit thing (i swear my teacher is so fucking demanding). I sort of really don't mind cause i want to see intramuros at night... then maybe i can take pictures. I so hope we can just go to the food festival thing and then i can pig out :D speaking of pigging out, i just did, minutes ago. our new cook is the best. IRRELEVANT.

today was extra hot. as in temperature-wise. I think i was experiencing my "hot flashes" again. LIke the surroundings were cool but i felt sticky and super duper dehydrated- but i wasn't. it was just so damn warm. hmmm... steadysteady..

day 1 over.

my friend had the greatest timing in the world. During calculus, after i sat down from looking for steph all over the building, she made me listen to the rainbow connection. that was nice

anyway, i've come to realize (just this very minute) that i have been breezing through things. no wonder i feel so drained. i need to take it down a notch i think, cause its like i'm going 120 on the 101. we all know how that'll end up. sooo yea, easy breezy from now on.. if i can help it

I'm also excited for the pre-launch of the mag. Not so much but yea, an excuse to dress up ;D

its christmas.

 

oooooh.. i am so back 

i forgot was i was supposed to write.

anyway, i went to the spa yesterday.. niiiicce..

hmm.. i'm hungry 

by the time i log on in here, i forget what i'm about to say.. and when i log out, it comes back.

why. why does it do that?

anyway, i finished my lit paper!! now one more and 2 quizzes to study for..

 

day 3 is soooo done!

someone has been racing with the early bird.

I can safely say that i wake up against my will. My body is still asleep when my head is already wide awake, and then i'll be going back to sleep a few hours later... and now, my body clock is whacked.

I have a bone to pick with that saying btw.

What if the early worm decided to sleep in that day? the Early bird would get the second early worm? but doesn't the bird, who exerted all the effort to get up early, at least deserve that damn unlucky 1st worm? OH! and what if the worm didn't CHOOSE to wake up at that time? what if the worm was just woken up by its mom?(nice) if it could have stayed a few more seconds in its bed(leaf, cocoon, whatever) would it be THE early worm we've all come to know and love? 

 

sorry, i've started to read this philosophy book disguised as a childrens book.. that and yes, i am actually pissed at the fact that my mind refuses to sleep in on a sunday! gaaah!

i have gone back to my old self. as in the old self in rhode ( i hope that was a smart thing to do- not like i really had a choice. i just suddenly felt different over the weekend)

sooo.. as a welcome to the old- new me, here's a tribute.. the traditional posting of the horoscope from friendster:

 

 

I hope you don't do well today... and i think you know why. I shall feed off of that happy energy you seem to be carrying around everywhere you go so that you'll be left with nothing for the rest of the day.

mwahahahahahahahahhahahahahaha

 

anyhoos, i'm up this early because we don't have accounting today.. yahooo what else.. watched this play in school yesterday.. it was nice, too bad my friends didn't appreciate it. ooh! and the person i so totally don't like is out of the country for a while ahhaha

last night was okidoki. i wore fur! hahahaah gotstobe glam! hahaha anyway, yea.. it was pretty tiring (as if i did anything) but yea.. it was cool. i remembered last night why i don't go out so much anymore too- wanted to get drunk but caught myself before things got ugly..

ooh gotta go, laters