| hmmmm.. is this nice? i like jordi labanda, i hope they don't sue me for using his work. anyway, i lost my glasses.. so now, my eyes are like 2 inches away from the screen. damn it hmmm what else what else, i'm also gonna have to change the font color and shit like that... |
just as i was getting extremely comfortable with the fact that i don't have a date to the prom, trust MTV to screw up my psyche and mix my head all over again.
Why is it so damn important for you to have a date to the prom anyway?
why? WHY?
try to get it through my thick skull and tell me the fuck WHY?!
god, i'm pms-ing again.
goodness... no limo..... possibly no transportation.... dinner before the prom....4 days to plan.....this is sounding almost like a normal problem in the life of bubi....
gawd...
its already like a quarter to 1 and i'm still up.. i am sleepy but i just have to say this because i'm just gonna forget tomorrow.
so i still have to figure out a way to get to the dinner place to prom, from the prom to the Y, and from the Y, to my house. Maybe i can ask my sisters to pick me up from the Y but all those trips in between are sort of a hassle... i have no idea how i am gonna get there. I also have no idea of why we don't have a limo.. damn it.
at least it distracts me from not having a date.
its already a quarter to 2... and i'm still up
sound familiar? well.. just got home from this wonderful night of magic mic-ing.... belted out notes like i never did before, unleashed the inner diva i must say. haha hmmm... still problems with prom transpo and all those wonderful things. i don't know what to do anymore, i'm in a corner, no leads whatsoever. i'm just going with the flow, as they say... and i have got to admit, i am SORT OF liking it. but you know, i'd rather be on top of things.
My family was talking about DRIVING from here to LA.... in 10 days. goodness.... i'm gonna need 3 books, 5 new dvds, and 2 new OSTs... hahah but i bet that would be fun.. thats gonna be like the ULTIMATE road trip.. from coast to coast - literally! its gonna be soooo sooo tiring tough.. whatever. just as long as we get a big big van and i would be alright... :D
it pays to have a very thorough friend. more thorough than me... can you believe it? kewlie. no more problems for prom night! hopefully.
crud...i was just about to type something but it totally slipped my mind...
(after 10 minutes)
okay, i just remembered it but i'm suddenly not excited to talk about it. anyway, yea i was gonna say that all my friends are over achievers like me.. so i didn't know why the heck i got all worked up about the prom plans.... hehehehe yknow what i mean? if i was already wound up tight at home, here i am considered a slacker... yes...
well, compared to my friends at least. hehehe i just hope everything goes well for prom...
i subconciously typed his name. i don't know if it was just my fingers typing faster than my brain working or if i really subconciously meant to type it.... that wasn't even why i logged on, i logged on to type about my dilemma for tonight....
should i or should i not go to senior night tonight?
wait. it was just answered.. read this horoscope in friendster (hehe loser i know, shut up) it says:
Continuing to do things a certain way because 'that's the way they've always been done' may feel safe and comfortable, but it's not exactly doing a whole lot to help you achieve your goals. So make an effort to get out of your comfort zone. Take a look at what you could be doing to get where you want to go -- even if it entails doing a real change-up to your life and habits. Be brave and take that first step.
so thats a yes, right? lets just see how 'brave' i am...
oooh.. just came home from prom!! Overall, i had FUN! i was with my friends, i looked smokin! hehehe and i won stuff in the post-prom party!
but of course there were times that.. yknow.. can't help but see the people during the slow dances (there were only 2, by the way.. i wanted to kiss the DJ) anyway, like last years prom, there was this guy who i think wanted to dance with me... at least 60%... hahah oh well, but he was too uhm... shy maybe? heheh ooh.. i sooo wanted to dance with cal he looked so hot tonight but i only saw him like twice.. goodness.. heheheh anyway, i'm glad 'he's' not here right now, i mean, if he was, i would probably have had a not-so-good time. yeaaaa.... but you know.. had fun.. i love it :D
hmm.. waiting to go to the senior picnic.. i'm actually not feeling it. Not just because the weather right now SUCKS ICE but also because i just wanna kick back and relax..
graduation on sunday.. get to keep my toga and shit.. its all cool i guess...
I'M GRADUATING!!!!!!!!!!!
i am now officially a graduate....
it feels so good
now i can breathe.
He was there, didn't change a bit
...3 weeks of college didn't do anything...
i missed him, but not as much as i thought i would
i was too distracted by the fact that I am already
a graduate....
**MIDDLETOWN HIGH SCHOOL CLASS OF 2005**
get me out of this emotional roller coaster i am on. it drives me crazy.
yesterday has got to be the most satisfying day of my entire life, until i nearly died.. along with my siblings. (very long story that i do not want to discuss).
They just HAD to choose yesterday.. yesterday of all freaking days.... yesterday.. was about ME and my achievements... and somehow.. somehow, they managed to turn it around and make it about them...
I think it would be best if they separated. You know, not legally.. like maybe if mom'll stay here.. or something... and then i can stay with her so i can finish college here too...
oh, what i would give to finish college here.
hohumm.. i am bored.. bored bored bored bored..
you want baggage with out life time guarantee
you don't want to watch me die
i just came to say
goodbye love
goodbye.
Your Deadly Sins |
| Pride: 80% |
| Envy: 60% |
| Sloth: 60% |
| Wrath: 40% |
| Greed: 20% |
| Lust: 20% |
| Gluttony: 0% |
| Chance You'll Go to Hell: 40% |
| You will become famous - and subsequently killed by a stalker. |
that i am extremely bored. never been bored like this.
bum.
gawd..
anyway, i was looking through all the maps AAA gave us for the road trip to LA... and to be honest, i was secretly longing to have our plane tickets back. With my parents, i don't even know if we'll make it there in one piece. ..
oh.. and i have been thinking lately (not a good sign, believe me) that i have grown very very tough. Like tough as in not mellow, not as emotional as i was before... i realized this as i was watching Moulin Rouge this morning. i remembered how i was soo moved by the whole movie the first time i saw it but a while ago i just didn't feel anything- which was particularly odd because i usually relate easily with these kinds of things. Now that i think about it, it's been a while since i felt real emotions. It has all been somewhat just a play for me.. you know? it felt like it was all pretend. I don't know how or why it just happened. It's not like i planned it to happen, or i wanted it... it just did.
and the worst part of it is, i don't know if i like it...
when i first saw him walk into the gym i tried my very best to ignore his entirety. i tried ignoring him i really did.
when i saw his brother it reminded me of him i tried my very best to ignore their resemblance.
when the chorus kept leaving their chairs several times i tried my very best to ignore his blue blue eyes.
But i failed.
hahaha. anyway, in about 4 days we're gonna be leaving RI... sniffity sniff sniff. i really do feel sad about leaving. i mean, this is such a quaint little state and it really did feel like home... I WILL COME BACK HERE. if not for vacation, for education or retirement. i promise that. mark my words.. i will come back here. i've learned to love this place and the people here.
Middletown is now officially my 2nd home.
little by litte my room is becoming bare
empty
cold
slowly, it's looking like the room i once visited one summer day in 04
it pains me to think that i'll be leaving this cozy little room
this cozy little room i would look forward to being in every single day
this cozy little room i would use to break free from the world and sit
think
learn
little by little i gather my memories from the 4 walls that sheltered me from everyone
little by little i start to wonder if i'm ready to go home...
but it really isn't.. it's just a "see you soon"... i love this place. i love the people. i love it.
i love it so much i don't think i wanna go home yet.
i'm a little less emotional now. But i bet tonight, it's gonna be useless because i'm gonna bawl my little eyes out once again. anyway, i blogged because i just wanted to remember these particular songs:
these words-natasha beidngfield, my world -darius rucker, relient k- my escape, time of your life- greenday, best of you- foo fighters, sattelite- dave matthews..
okidoki..
huwellhuwell
in nevada right now, preparing to go to frisco in a few
and then we'll go to LA...
damn.. can't believe it was possible
can't believe i'm still alive...
cross country road trip from RI to LA soon to conclude....
